Experimental Writing v Posting While Drunk: A Short Observation

No Village Idiot today. Just a few comments about something we'd like to see more of at the Rep: experimental comment writing--not to be confused with posting while drunk.

But, first, does it seem to you as it does to I Hate Canton, that some of our Reppies tipple a bit before they hit their keys?

In real life, IHC has witnessed this phenomenon in the field in which we work. One regular poster to several forums and blogs we frequent, likes to hit the bottle on Friday nights--and you can always tell. Sometimes she returns in the morning and nukes her posts--especially when other posters remark about her oddities of logic, sense, and grammar. It's become rather a sport to archive her ravings to toss back at her at an appropriate moment.

IHC, though, really hadn't thought much about Reppies posting while drunk. They seem to be unbalanced enough without any outside influences. Of course, one could claim that Just S tom has been on a year-long bender, though we prefer to think of our resident millionaire (see entry directly below) as just plain dumb.

We were surprised then to see the following post from the usually sober bobg telling us in yesterday's Rep, just how he feels about Ron Paul, under the Ron Paul Stands for Preserving Liberty and Keeping Family Values thread. To the untrained eye it reads a little boozy:

bobg

He supports the nuts Waco Ruby Ridge he is mitlita go away he is a waste he is like the antiChrist

We don't remember bobg posting much, but he never struck us as some illiterate millionaire, and English doesn't seem to be his second language as we thought in our youth might be the case with kaleeb. Upon reading this comment, though, we initially thought Bob had joined the ranks of the comment tippling, (or was trying his hand at Haiku, and failing miserably). But as we read it out loud several times, we began to see what Bob was doing. He's writing a prose poem about 9/11 America. Or better yet, a song!

Remember the Beatles Come Together? Take any verse. This is the one IHC likes best:

He roller-coaster he got early warning
He got muddy water he one mojo filter
He say "One and one and one is three"
Got to be good-looking 'cause he's so hard to see
Come together right now over me

There's a similarity in style and beat (spelling posted as posted). Or maybe we're drinking.

He supports the nuts

Waco Ruby Ridge

he is mitlita

go away

he is a waste

he is like the antiChrist

OK, it needs some work, and Bob's no John Lennon. IHC, however, would like to see more of Bob's experimental work. We don't want to see him limited to traditional American prose, such as this, which he also wrote yesterday in resonse to Kennth Floom's assertion that world peace can be brought about by outlawing abortion.

bobg

If Next Generation is to Know Peace ,We Should Stop Abortion Now

I would wish people would let women control there own bodies. With the morning after pill abortions should be down . These right to lifers want to save every serial killer Why do the prolifers get to make someone have a baby when they choose not to have a baby what gives them the right to tell a woman to not have a abortion. I don't see these prolifers picking up the bill to pay for all these unwanted kids.

A worthy sentiment for sure, but Bob, hype it up a little! You could have a whole new career ahead of you.

Village Idiot of the Day, May 5, 2011: Cool Mom

We got a late start today, so we're cutting to the chase.

I Hate Canton has studiously avoided abortion as a topic here. Never-ending abortion arguments on either side can eat up your logic and your brain. (We prefer to lose them over SARTA or Obama's birth certificate, which have a light at the end of the tunnel at some point.) Some of yesterday's comments under "Heartbeat" Bill Draws National Attention, however, have been so egregious that we can't sit still.

Leading the pack is a new entry, Cool Mom, who claims to be an obstetrical nurse. And a Christian. (Aren't they all?) She starts out with typical hardcore anti-abortion commentary, which I won't bother to deal with here, since there's nothing particularly startling about it...then jumps the shark:

Cool Mom:

And the punishments should be...drum roll, please..... equal to those of murder in the first degree. I believe that's life in prison. Some people would add death penalty, but I, personally, don't think that we mere humans should have the right to decide when another human should die.

Before we go on, we would remind Cool Mom that in 2009 (the last year statistics are available), Ohio reported 28,721 abortions performed. According to a report [pdf] published in March 2011 by the Ohio Criminal Sentencing Commission chaired by Ohio Supreme Court Justice Maureen O'Connor and published on the Ohio Supreme Court website, Ohio prisons hold approximately 51,000 inmates--31% over rated capacity. The Marysville Reformatory for Women, as of April 11, 2011 holds 2451 inmates.

We are genuinely puzzled about the fiscal and logistical implications of Cool Mom's suggestion. Perhaps she is a major stockholder in The Geo Group. Maybe she prefers the FEMA camp model.

Whatever, she may meet with some resistance from our anti-SARTA crowd who can't bear the thought of parting with $50 of their hard-earned money each year for public transportation. IHC is no mathematician, nonetheless, it boggles our mind to contemplate the cost of prison construction and prisoner upkeep for nearly 29,000 additional lifers each year. In just two years, under the Cool Mom Plan, Ohio would double its prison population; and in just 10 years, Ohio's prison population could equal that of the current population of Cincinnati. We suggest Cool Mom revise her suggestion to simply that of building The Great Fence of Ohio, a 30 foot electrical fence topped with barbed wire to surround the state. This should take are of tweakers, rockheads, and crooked Stark County politicians, as well.

As if her prison scheme isn't enough, Mrs. Mom (we doubt she's single) complains about "very young teen mothers who "can't keep their legs crossed" including an 11-year old victim of incest. In response to a comment by theame19, she writes

Cool Mom (paragraphed for easier reading)

theame19,

I think this subject requires a little more thought and understanding than you are capable of providing. I deal with the detailed complexities every day when I go to work and care for very young teen mothers (as young as 11) and their babies. I am an OB nurse. Now, how did most of these girls get to be under my care? Because for some reason or another they couldn't keep their legs together!! An extremely small number of these girls are there for rape or incest. Abortion is not the answer. We need to educate our children and teach them morals and values.

(ps... in Catholic doctrine abortion is allowed for rape, incest, and to save the live of the mother.)

Good night and God bless.

followed a few comments down by (again paragraphed for easier reading)

Cool Mom
The 11 year old was an incest victim. I treat ALL my patients with respect and dignity no matter their age, race, sexual orientation, etc. They all gave BIRTH. They chose life over death for their babies. There's nothing that pro abortion people can say or do to change my opinion on the matter of abortion.

Now, may I suggest all pro abortionists commenting on this forum please check their attitudes and sarcasm....Your ignorance is showing. (sorry I had to stoop so low to get your attention)

Signing off now.....Coolest Mom!!

Personally, we're happy that our mom is not as cool as Cool Mom. And, we doubt if Cool Mom's 11-year old patient had much of a choice in anything that happened to her.

As an OB nurse, Cool Mom seems to have forgotten some of the dangers inherent in the pregnancy of an 11-year old: preeclampsia ( high blood pressure and protein in the urine that can lead to convulsions and multi-system organ failure); cholestasis (blockage of bile, which can lead to stillbirth and placenta problems); premature labor and birth (including compromise of baby's size, developmental delays, and chromosomal abnormalities); stillbirth; chance of developing fatty liver, which can be fatal--and, of course, death for the mother due to an underdeveloped vagina.

And let's not even get into the legal and psychological aspects of incest. Apparently her 11-year old patient just "couldn't keep her legs crossed." Shame on her!

Most of the time we find our Reppies amusing, aggravating, maddening, and occasionally disgusting. Seldom do we find them loathsome.

We are happy to present Cool Mom with the VillageIdiot of the Day Award, May 4, 2011.

Village Idiot of the Day: October 13, 2009: redeemyourself now, maxwell, 1lynn

As we wrote earlier, it's becoming increasingly difficult to read Rep comments without a barf bag at the ready. We wonder where these people come from. Are they products of CPS (the Canton Public Schools, not Child Protective Services) they continually insult? As a product of CPS ourself, we doubt it. No. We'll, we take that back. We know our Octopuppet is a CPS grad. We were there.

Anyway, it continues to be difficult to separate the chaff from the chaff or take these non-de-plumers seriously. Cheering that the US didn't get the Olympics and complaining that Bob Dylan will preform in Canton (see blog below) is not only getting hard to take, but a sign of civic depravity. We can't wait for these topics to be conflated into abortionoia.

After looking through the material before us. we are considering moving to Andorra or Norway. Even an urt in Wyoming would be preferable to current Canton culture.

In an attempt to catch up we present three examples from last week

We begin with drama queens and queers:

redeemyourselfnow
Obama to Take on Military Gay Ban at "Right Time"
Why are gay guys drama queens, this is exactly what the military does not need. They should make up their minds, which is it, don't ask don't tell that they fought for for decade and got or they want to be open. I am so sick of hearing people whining wanting it both ways like the world is all about them. Grow t.h. up, this country has way more pressing problems than you gay boys not making up your mnds because of your pms.


Then move on to the closely related topic of CIA torture and abortion:

Maxwell
Obama's About-Face on Probe of CIA Will Almost Certainly Weaken Agency
Scraping away a bunch of cells from a woman's uterus or 'partial birth abortion' isn't the issue at all. The killing of a human being with a beating heart and functioning nervous system is the issue. Why is that so difficult to understand. If we as a society condone the killing of a fetus, why is it so difficult to call it what it really is? It seems that many on the left have more sympathy for the cowards that seek to destroy us than they do for innocent unborn childen. We will all stand before God someday, try and explain that away!

I lost any compassion for the cowards that attacked our citizens (not military) countrymen without a declaration of war after standing at the site of the World Trade Centers in late Oct of 2001 and still being able to smell the rotting flesh and blood of our countrymen. Anyone that hasn't had the opportunity to stand where the towers fell should make the visit and see if their view of 'compassion' for our enemy changes! Known terrorists should not be awarded the same consideration under Terms of the Geneva convention and on equal footing as members of an opposing army / military captured under the rules of war.

Finally we have 1Lynn whose comment, though we think we know what she is trying to say, would have gotten I Hate Canton 12 hours at the CPS blackboard. While we hold generally Clifton Fadiman's view that one need not always express one's thoughts in proper English to get the idea across, we make an exception in this case. Unfortunately, we neglected to collect the link and can't find where this gem originated. But it's real. IHC didn't' make it up:

1lynn
Why do people say we are trying to shove are believes on them.we are not trying to shove anything on them we are just saying. what a mighty god we serve .its your choice.wright or wrong.but rember your chouse and we wont stand for you to take ares/

In order to expedite ourself into the future, we name redeemyourselfnow, maxwell, and 1lynn co-Village Idiot of the Day, October 13, 2009. We feel almost apologetic to 1Lynn who may not have had the advantage of of CPS education, but that's the breaks.

Village Idiot of the Day, June 3, 2009: ditto, ottertk1, marinedoc

In retrospect, I Hate Canton should have awarded "Tina S" with yesterday's Village Idiot Award, but "Tina" deserves a special place in our hearts and minds. Rumor has it that "she" is a local male wannabe politician. What better way to start that journey to City Hall than by making stupid, incoherent remarks on the online edition of the Rep?

In the meantime, here are some other worthies to consider:

First, we have our friend Ottertk1. He wants to execute any convicted felon found with a firearm. Our resident barcolounge brigade should appreciate that kind of tough original legal thinking.

Ottertk1
Bar Violence is Symptom of Something Bigger, More Dangerous
Many of these shootings were committed by convicted felons with guns. If they get caught, they get a slap on the wrist or plea bargain their way out of the charge. It's time to save lives. If a convicted felon gets caught with a firearm, they must be sentenced to death. By making the penalty for having a gun so severe, the majority of convicted felons will start giving guns a wide bearth. People's lives are at stake and it's better to bury a felon, then an innocent child or loved one.

These classic comments were found under Wichita Police: Abortion Doctor Killed at His Church. Unfortunately, they, along with every other comment on the thread, were removed--but not before we caught them!

Marinedoc found Dr. Tiller's murder "amusing."

marinedoc
C'mon, the doctor didnt have a pulse, the gunman didnt murder this doctor, he just aborted him. lol just kidding, I find the irony of this story amusing.

"Ditto" (short for Dittohead?), not only finds Dr. Tiller's murder justifiable, but inexplicably locates "aborted babies" in hell where they can take potshots at the doctor who"ditto" assumes went south. I have a call in to Pope Ratzo right now to see if this is true: that aborted fetuses reside in the hot place. Now that the church has done away with Limbo, maybe it is so (unless they are baptized, of course!

Ditto
I wonder if all the babies he killed get first crack at him in hell

I Hate Canton, after much thought and turmoil, names ditto the June 3, 2009 First Place Village Idiot of the Day winner.

ottertk2 comes in Second and Honorable Mention goes to marinedoc.

It would be interesting to see what otterk1, marinedoc, and ditto plan to do about the accused killer of Dr. Tiller, Scott Roeder. We guess, though, that that's different.

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Village Idiot of the Day, June 1, 2009: BCheeks, Cal, lvmypets

Reppies were in a charitible mood yesterday, with few viral remarks posted. That will be remedied soon, no doubt.

As you know, I Hate Canton is loathe to get into the subject of abortion. We were pleased, though, that there were so many reasonable remarks regarding the Sunday murder of late term abortion provider, Dr. George Tiller in Wichita. Even our regulars who oppose abortion were not exactly gleeful, and few shilled for Bill O'Reilly. But then there is former Village Idiot Award winner BCheeks who can always be counted on to make a truly stupid comment. Who, for instance, can forget his/her May 20 award winning remark to commenter Margaret, regarding abortion:

See Margaret: Look how many people are glad to have the right to kill another human.

But this is old news. Yesterday BCheeks reached new heights of stupidity where few locals have gone before in Activist Calls Abortion Doctor Killing Overdue.

BCheeks
'Pro-choice offers no violence' Ya I heard they sing songs to the unborn while they're killing them, then they whistle happy tunes while they throw the remains in the trash. It's definitly not violent. It's death in a nonviolent way.

We would be remiss in not quoting two "pro-life" activists who appeared in the article Cheeky so astutely commented on:

As news of Roeder’s arrest traveled, Kansas City activist Regina Dinwiddie remembered the day a dozen years ago when Roeder hugged her in glee after trying to frighten an abortion provider by staring him down inside a Planned Parenthood clinic.

“He grabbed me and said, ‘I’ve read the Defensive Action Statement* and I love what you’re doing,’ ” Dinwiddie said in a telephone interview. She was a signer of the 1990s statement, which declares that the use of force is justified.

“I said, ‘You need to get out of here. You can get in a lot of trouble,’ ” Dinwiddie recalled.

Dinwiddie said she does not consider death of Tiller, the nation’s most prominent provider of controversial late-term abortions, to be a homicide.

“I don’t think he was murdered. I believe he was absolutely stopped in his tracks and it was long overdue,” Dinwiddie said. She declined to say when she last spoke with Roeder.

Dave Leach, a Des Moines antiabortion activist who also signed the statement, said Sunday night by telephone that he published some of Roeder’s writings in “Prayer & Action News,” which describes itself as “a trumpet call for the Armies of God to assemble.”

NOTE TO REGINA DUNWIDDIE: Get a copy of Black's Law Dictionary.

Before we announce our awards, we must visit two other sterling examples of intelligent Reppie thought.

Echoing Ms. Dimwit...I mean, Dinwidde's thoughts on divine retribution we have "Cal" gloating over the divine retribution possibilities in the fire that destroyed the barn, livestock, and bobblehead business of Stark County Commissioner Todd Bosley out in Marlboro Twn. Bosley's' sin: pushing through a .25% county sales tax.

$1.1 Million Dollar Fire Destroys Stark County Commissioner's Barn, Business
Cal
Look on the bright side Commissioner Bosley.

Thanks to your forcing the one half percent increase in the county sales tax on us, the insurance company paying to rebuild your 1.1 million dollar barn, will give Stark County an EXTRA $5,500.00 in sales tax revenue.

and later:

Like you said, a .005 % increase in sales tax is really nothing you will even notice.
Yes, what happened to compassion? Bosley has little compassion for those who opposed his tax increase (go to a tax hearing and witness how insulting he can be to people with a valid opinion other than his) and the negative effects it will have on many people losing the modest roofs over their heads in Stark County. What goes around comes around and when you are in politics and acting the way he acts then this is fair game.

Finally, lvmypets weights in on the search for a new SARTA boss:

lvmypets
According to the names, it seems like they all may be American citizens.

Noting that nothing can come close to BCheeks penetrating analysis of abortion procedures, we are forced to grant Mr/Ms Cheeks the First Place Village Idiot Award for June 1, 2009. While not quite virulent enough for a top prize, we are happy to give Cal and lvmpets Honorable Mentions. These two show much promise, and we look forward to further entries from them.

*The Defensive Action Statement appears on the Army of God website. Be prepared for gory pictures and demands for the deaths of abortion providers.

Village Idiot of the Day, May 20, 2009: ottertk1, BCheeks

We were hooked on G-O-D (not to be confused with G-d) and abortion yesterday. ottertk1 and BCheeks running neck-and-neck make it difficult to hide, though we can try to run.

I Hate Canton commends ottertk1 for his/her refreshing insight into Christianity.

In a response to the letter to the editor, Solution to World's Problems Can Be Found in Three Letter Word: G-O-D, our Christian friend, comparing the decadence of the latter Roman Empire to the decadence of current US culture (we thought that went out with Taylor Caldwell and Pillar of Iron) points out that after the Romans stopped worshipping sun gods and took up the cross of Jesus, "wild sex parties and homosexual acts [that] became a daily occurrence." We must have missed the part of the Bible that teaches "wild sex parties" are the door to salvation. We don't remember the subject discussed by Tertullian or Clement of Alexander, either, but maybe St. "Bluto" Augustine, gets into it. It's been a long time since we read the City of God. We are grateful, though, that ottertk1 has pointed out this teaching no matter its provenance. The long weekend ahead will give I Hate Canton the perfect opportunity to take the first step on that long and winding road to salvation.

Solution to World's Problems Can Be Found in Three Letter Word: G-O-D
Ottertk1
Our country was founded at a time when people tried to follow the teachings of the Bible. Religion was a big part of the majority of Americans. The first Amendment which denies the government the Right to create a State religion and allows each citizen the Right to practice their own religion are just a couple of examples of how important religion was at that time in history. Now look at the Roman Empire. The Empire transitioned from worshiping sun gods and other other idols to Christianity. Then they started thinking of their own pleasures with wild sex parties and homosexual acts that became a daily occurrence. In other words, they became very lax in the ways of the government and more intent on personal pleasures. What happened, the Empire fell in 410AD. Overthrown by barbarians from the north. As history always repeats itself, America should be careful not to fall into the same trap as the Romans. You may or may not believe in God, but at least try to follow the teachings of the Bible in your daily life.

Later, ottertk1 reminded us that women, don't exist, at least as part of the Judeo-Christian God's plan. This, of course, not only explains all that homosexual activity in post-Christian conversion Rome, but the writer's belief, shown elsewhere that women are natural born killers.

Replying to Randall Flag's complaint:

What's all this 'He' stuff? God is neither male nor female; the Bible is clear about this. Let's keep talking about God, but let's not reduce him to a particular human gender

Ottertk1 replied:

Randall Flagg, God created man in his own image. Therefore, God is a man.

Another important Christian insight we're reminded of thanks to ottie: God has a penis; thus women cannot be of God and definitely not in HIS image.

While G-O-D was the ranking subject yesterday, we cannot in good conscience leave out BCheeks for his/her follow-up comment in (see previous blog) Advocates of More Gun Control Has Misplaced Concern:

BCheeks:
See Margaret: Look how many people are glad to have the right to kill another human.

We're afraid, though that ottertkr1 was a bigger idiot yesterday than BCheeks. We must, therefore, award him/her first place, with BCheeks an honorable mention. (If Mr or Ms Cheeks had expanded the comment it may have ranked higher.

Better luck next time!

Village Idiot of the Day, May 19, 2009 (holdover): BCheeks, ottertk1

I Hate Canton's life conflicted with I Hate Canton's fun yesterday, so today we're doing a little backlogging. As we said in our last blog, we had a hold over: abortion.

Now, I Hate Canton is loathe to become involved in the abortion conflict. Of course, Reppies love nothing more than to whup ass each other on the subject, so it's hard to ignore no matter how hard we try.

Maybe the holdover was a good thing. We were ready to award our old friend "ottertk1" first place for sheer stupidity. But then "BCheeks" had to weigh in and the stupidity became even sheerer!

In order of appearance here is what we find in Advocates of More Gun Control Has Misplaced Concern

ottertk1:
Maybe some sort of license or permit should be required of women wanting an abortion. The permit or license would be issued after the women pass a background check and attend a class on parenting and witness an abortion. The class could talk about the emotional effects of having an abortion. It could also teach contraceptive methods. If licensing and having a permit is required, or is going to be required, to own a firearm which is a Right, why not require the same for abortion, which is also a right?

BCheeks

Face it, some women just love the fact that they can kill another human and it's legal. If they can live with themselves after that, that's their problem (and of course the unborn's problem also). It's a shame it's that way, but I will admit it is legal. Don't feel GUILTY women, the supreme court say's you can do it, so it must be ok. I must admit though....I couldn't live with myself if I made that decision.

So, in the words of commenter Margaret to Mr. or Ms Cheeks: "That has to be the stupidest statement I have ever read," we are proud to present "BCheeks" Grand Prize for making the stupidest statement we have ever read. "ottertk1" comes in a close second.

By the way, we've been waiting for "ProChoice liberal" to post her usual inane commentary on the other side, but she's disappointed us. So far her inanity hasn't even come close to an honorable mention. Come on PCL We know you can do it!

Village Idiot of the Day: May 6, 2009: Frank Manello, Tom Dewey

The Village Idiot is back!

I Hate Canton has been trying to get back on track and reading older comments. To pick up some slack we are belatedly bestowing our Daily Village Idiot Award on Frank Manello and Tom Dewey for their lively analysis of the interaction of the Democratic Party, NAMBLA, abortion and waterboarding. Normally we would award Mr. Dewey an honorable mention, but since "he" is Octopuppet and an alleged staunch Democrat from the Team Healy Cult, we believe a higher award is warranted.

Here are the winning comments (in order of appearance):

Letter: Which is Really Torture: Getting Enemy to Talk or Extinguishing Baby's Life?
Frank Manello

Let's see, according to some it is okay to kill a baby but not okay to inconvenience someone who wants to kill you. If anyone needed proof that the liberal 'brain' is in fact defective, the proof can be found in the comments above.

I also ask these staunch defenders of infanticide if they have in fact had or been party to an abortion, or do they just talk the talk? While we're at it, how many of you are members of NAMBLA? What do you people have against children?

Frank Manello
AC thanks to the tax system I am supporting many children who are not mine. I'm probably even paying for your food stamps.

As usual your 'logic' is non-existent, The Dems welcome NAMBLA and all other perverts. Since love of abortion is at the heart of the Dem party, NAMBLA must love abortion.

Talk about showing up unarmed to a battle of wits.

Tom Dewey
Frank Manello:

I bet you are right. Most of these clowns probably are members of NAMBLA. I'll guarantee half of these respondents are in their 40's, pasty white, and still sponging off mommy & daddy.

They cry whenever anyone disagrees with them. They support the 1st Amendment as long as it agrees with them. They are the first ones to complain when some cop takes their dope away because the law only applies to everyone else.

Their motto is: If it feels good, do it, don't let anyone get in the way of your good time!

I'm sure all of them would be for torturing if terrorists nuked their pot farms or their Toyota Prius'.

Frank Manello
Tom Dewey, Yes, and I'll bet none of them would have a problem with waterboarding President Bush. The liberal 'mind'; anything that feels good at the moment or advances their cause.

Frank Manello

Why are liberals so over the edge unhappy? I believe winning the election has made psycho's out of some of them. Or maybe just exposed them for the psycho's they already were. Perhaps it is that they just have to hate someone. Perhaps it is the weight of responsibilty in having to put their money where there mouths are now that they can't blame the Republicans? Perhaps they don't like what they see when they look in the mirror?

What more proof than the hysterical comments above is needed to confirm that liberalism is indeed a mental defect?

Oh yes, NAMBLA is a collection of perverts who are defended by the ACLU who is loved by the Democratic Party and funded by liberals.

Frank Manello

Don, you are who your friends are. Look at the groups who make up the Democrat Party.Do they make you proud?

TAC, I will agree that I loathe any and all child molestors. I certainly could never belong to any party or club that they belong to.